You won’t believe everything that happened in the last 24 hours!
Governor Drama AKA Mandela Barnes went to a fair and posted a video showing him on a thrill ride zig zagging around, and then rambled about roller coasters. He’s not going to let Tom Tiffany own the “you betcha, I’m country” turf. This was kind of a metaphor for Mandela’s entire thrill ride life, from not paying property taxes to tossing wild lingerie parties. Wait, what? Mandela held a lingerie party? Where have you been? It’s also a metaphor for the insane Democratic governor’s race primary, but I don’t think he saw the irony. Don’t blame me. I’m just in the cheap seats with other observers cackling loudly while eating a tub of caramel corn.
Thrills should be reserved for rides, not everyday living.
As governor, I’ll raise wages and lower costs, because getting by shouldn’t feel like a rollercoaster. pic.twitter.com/tg6dDjDztL
— Mandela Barnes (@TheOtherMandela) July 20, 2026
“Thrills should be reserved for rides, not everyday living. As governor, I’ll raise wages and lower costs, because getting by shouldn’t feel like a roller coaster” — Mandela Barnes.
Yes, Mandela hosted a lingerie party. This is a core piece of epic Mandela Barnes lore. This “news story” emerged when Mandela ran for lieutenant governor in 2018 (best guess, some Democratic operative leaked it; they’ve been out to get him for a long time.) Turns out, he was 22. He admitted to Wisconsin Public Radio that it was immature to host a lingerie party. The story breathlessly revealed that the invite braqged about “stimulus packages.” Mandela’s response was to pledge to protect women’s rights and family leave. We’re now at the point where I laugh at my own sentence.
The 2009 Barnes bash was titled “Pretty In Pink A Vicky Secret Affair.” According to Fox News, it was “a lingerie party that barred ‘ratchets’ – slang for trashy women – from attending.” My goodness.
What happens if a bachelor governor, as Barnes would be, holds a lingerie party at the governor’s mansion and advertises it on Tinder? Is that allowed? (Can you advertise stuff on Tinder or do you just swipe at people? I might be revealing my lack of Tinder knowledge here.) What if he tries to hold a foam party? Somehow I could see Lee Snodgrass and Amanda Nedweski being down for that. They seem like fun. That’s meant as a compliment.
Will the Wisconsin governor’s mansion turn into that party mansion on The Bachelor if voters give Mandela the final rose? Say what you want about Tony Evers (or David “Urkel” Crowley). You won’t catch them hosting a lingerie party. Tom Tiffany, either. The most you’re probably going to get out of Tiffany is him wearing a cheeky “State Dad” apron on Packer Sunday to grill you a brat. Wisconsin Public Radio also ran a story revealing that Tiffany cracks “dad jokes.” I’m really excited. My State Dad label for Tiffany is sticking!
WPR even dragged out former Republican state Sen. DALE SCHULTZ in a flannel shirt to trash Tiffany as supposedly being mean. The media loves “once or former Republicans who trash Republicans in the liberal media” even more than Mandela loves lingerie. And that’s saying a lot. They countered Schultz with strategist Mark Graul, who I remember from Mark Green’s old campaign for governor (nice guy), and he said that actually Tiffany is genuine and authentic. Last I heard of Dale Schultz, he was urging passage of an ethanol mandate over the wishes of Scott Walker. The guy has been doing this stuff for years.
The Great Socialist Hunter
Meanwhile, the Democrats’ “Great Socialist Hunter” Crowley went on the podcast-broadcast circuit to endlessly intone that he’s not actually the establishment’s handpicked candidate. Yeah, okay. Governor Evers just decided to endorse you from Africa because it popped into his mind out of the blue and you’re the greatest candidate ever, bless his heart, when he didn’t endorse you for months and when you (Crowley) said another candidate was the best ever just a few days ago (Sara Rodriguez, now out of the race)…this coup has had a sluggish start.
I heard desperate Democrat establishment types are hoping to trot out a Tammy Baldwin endorsement for Crowley next. Yeah, that will really help, guys. Engineer a big establishment endorsement to convince already angry folks the establishment isn’t behind this. Great plan!
The Dane County Democrats rushed out the results of an unscientific, totally ridiculous straw poll that showed the Establishment Hope Crowley in the lead with… 19 votes. They thought this made him look good. Meanwhile, that side’s best candidate for a general election, Joel Brennan, got a measly two votes. Those two voters probably read my Facebook page. It’s all a train wreck.
Wake Up! They Want to Abolish the Presidency!
Lost in all of this chaos, the DSA, the insane group that Democratic front runner Francesca Hong BELONGS to, updated its national platform to make it explicitly clear that their goal is to destroy the American government. But, you know, according to Democrats, Republicans are the threat to democracy. The new platform reveals that DSA explicitly wants to get rid of capitalism. To soften people up to this idea, which has failed umpteen times over the last 200 years, they ran a graphic of a person snoozing in bed to indicate how carefree your life could be if you didn’t have to work and government paid for everything (who wants to tell them?) This probably has appeal with 20somethings who are living in their parents’ basement in McMansions in Ozaukee County, but, for anyone who understands history or economics, it’s quite obvious why this wouldn’t work.
The DSA also explained that it wants to abolish the presidency, U.S. Senate, and Supreme Court, and replace them with a super Congressional body that appoints the executive, thus stripping away your right to vote for a president. Somewhere George Washington is turning over in his grave. Maybe the modern-day George Washington Mike Alfonso should weigh in on that.
This is serious business, probably the biggest threat to the American way of life since Valley Forge. Hong belongs to DSA, was endorsed by DSA, and DSA is campaigning aggressively for her. She’s DSA. The state media have only reported on a piece of this dangerous insanity (abolish the police.) Hong has literally posted about her desire to abolish police, prisons and the U.S. Senate, all DSA planks. Of course, she will try to recalibrate for election time, but if she wins, the Democratic Party of Wisconsin may almost cease to exist. Her allegiance is to DSA, and guess what, they probably want to abolish DPW too.
And not a single Democrat candidate, including feckless, lazy AG Josh Kaul, found their inner Paul Revere to strongly condemn this. Au contraire. The state of Wisconsin Democrat Party’s weaselly chairman Devin “I’m No Ben Wikler” Remiker wrote on social media that “we will go all in behind our nominee – no matter who it is – to defeat Tom Tiffany.” This post was apparently deemed necessary to try to convince the restless, divided Democratic Party’s fractured base that the establishment was really, really, really not behind trying to rig the nomination for Crowley (really. Too bad they telegraphed the whole plot to WISN’s Matt Smith before it launched.)
All Remiker really managed to telegraph is that the Democrat Party is willing to go “all in” to support a woman whose allegiance is to a group that literally wants to eliminate the U.S. Constitution (this is not even hyperbole. It’s on their website.) Because, you know, to Remiker, the dam tender who wants to cut taxes is the bigger threat to the country than the woman who wants to destroy America.
The establishment just can’t get anything right. Just DAYS before Sara Rodriguez’s establishment campaign crumbled suddenly, the Wisconsin Election Commission ruled NOT to allow people who voted (a lot already have) to re-vote. This thwarts their efforts to boost Crowley all the more. Oh well, hoisted on their own petard. Hilariously, a Milwaukee TV station propped up wily Democrat insider election lawyer Mike Maistelman as if he was almost just a regular voter guy who sadly didn’t get to change his ballot.
DNR Secretary?
Leave it to state Rep. Jim Piwowarczyk (R-Hubertus) to cut to the core of it all, and say in 15 words or so what I say in 5,000. Jim returned from some fishing trip to Lake of the Woods and asked me what happened in the governor’s race (ha!) Upon hearing all of the details, he calmly intoned, “I don’t get it. Why did they rally around David Crowley as the best candidate when he was only at 5%?”
Jim then revealed that he returned home to 10 text messages from people wondering if he’s going to be DNR secretary. I joked on my Facebook page that Tiffany should make Jim DNR secretary. Wow. This page’s reach is bonkers. “Everyone reads your page,” intoned Jim.
He revealed that he went to some big event and got stopped every few feet by people asking if he’s going to be DNR secretary.
Come to think of it, true sportsman Jim would make a great DNR secretary. Just for fun, I asked him what he would do if he was DNR secretary, and he launched into this endless soliloquy about how Wisconsin needs to become a major fishing destination again and the lakes should be restocked and something about the turkey hunt and muskie season opener and how, instead, the DNR is fixated on writing people dumb tickets while they enjoy the Fourth of July on pontoons. About the time he started waxing on about purple bucktail jigs, I lost interest and hung up to watch old NYPD Blue reruns. Jim, call state Rep. Duke Tucker. I am sure he will talk about purple bucktail jigs with you for hours.
Please Stay Off Crazy Podcasts
Which brings me to the final point of insanity, and all this happened in the last 24 hours. Crazy podcasts.
For the love of God, can governor candidates PLEASE stop going on crazy podcasts. Both Francesca Hong and Tom Tiffany spent the day beating each other up for going on crazy podcasts. Nice distraction, Fran, but you want to eliminate the U.S. Senate and the Outagamie County Sheriff’s Department, and Tom Tiffany doesn’t. But, yeah, you both went on crazy podcasts. Got it.
Tiffany started it out by reminding people that Hong went on the podcast of a guy, Hasan Piker, who said Mao Zedong was a great leader and other horrific stuff. Tiffany reminded people that Mao Zedong was responsible for the deaths of 40 million people, and Hong accepted $7,000 from Piker. Good hit because Piker also said horrible stuff about Jewish people and blamed the U.S. for 9/11 and other crazy things, and Hong went on his podcast. Revealing.
Hong, feisty socialist that she is, then flipped this podcast narrative back on Tiffany and reminded him that he also went on a crazy podcast, of a guy named Jeremy Hambly, who made awful jokes about H*tl*r and the H*lo*caust. Around this time, I almost had a stroke.
Now, I don’t believe for a second that Tiffany condones those things or even knew Hambly said them. I believe that some DC campaign bro tossed him on a podcast without bothering to vet it. It turns out that he ambled on this podcast on radio row at Turning Point’s big Arizona event last December.
I don’t take Francesca Hong’s word for things, so I googled Jeremy Hambly, and it took me one minute to discover that there is no way in hell that any Republican governor candidate should move within a mile of Jeremy Hambly. In fact, I found a video of Hambly (years before the Tiffany appearance) that so offended me that I walked 4.5 miles around Fowler Lake to blow off steam. And this comes after Tiffany has had a great few weeks with perfect PR while his opponents are crumbling. I am reminded of some old quote where Barack Obama said he never underestimated the ability of Joe Biden to F things up. Same is true of the DC campaign bros. Don’t underestimate them.
My students and I once chronicled the stories of the last 20 remaining concentra*i*n c*mp survivors in the Milwaukee area, and it was one of the most moving experiences of my life. These were the most gentle of souls. And joking about mass m*rder is wildly offensive.
Again, Tom Tiffany didn’t say this stuff. He probably didn’t even know Hambly (who has Wisconsin ties) said this stuff. And, unlike Hong, there is no evidence he stands for sh*t like this. But the future of our state is at stake, and such unforced errors are thus inexcusable. SPARE me the lecture about IRONY and SATIRE and how Hambly was JUST joking and isn’t crazy. Whatever. I don’t care if these guys have lots of followers. Keep Tom Tiffany off crazy podcasts. The great Mark Belling once opined that humor is easily misperceived. The attack ads write themselves.
I get what the DC campaign bros were probably thinking. Donald Trump went on podcasts because Barron told him to and it helped him win the election! Yeah, sure. It’s Donald Trump. Literally zero state voters will vote for Tiffany because he went on the podcast of an obscure guy who talks about claw machines yet it has the potential for really bad headlines and to muck up the anti-Hong podcaster narrative. Jeremy’s claim to fame is telling the TODAY Show that claw machines can be rigged.
Can we please get the A team involved here? Is there even an A team? As a conservative pundit, I frankly resent having to choose between criticizing Tom Tiffany (whom I generally really like) and being a total hypocrite since I bashed Hong over Piker. Which is another reason why I am an independent.
Tom, free advice. Stick with Dan O’Donnell or John Mercure. If you really want to let down your hair and speak to someone goofy, fine, you can go on Steve Scaffidi.
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